In My Paint Box…

Hi Everyone,

This weeks poem is…. well my only defense is it’s my painting week which may be no defense at all, but there it is. A look inside my paint box and one too many conversations with canvases and paintings that are waiting to be… *cheesy grin*

I hope you all had a good Easter/Long weekend. My best wishes to all for a good week to come.

Tikarma.xxxx

In My Paint Box….

.

I am always dreaming…

.

Writing you letters

in my heart so stained now with ink blots

I am black from within

leaving fingerprint stains upon the cranium of retrospective wonderings.

.

I am forever dreaming…

Rich satin fantasies

billowing their cardinal red ribbons

impressed in their own surrealism.

Torrid and haughty in their Tyrian purples

abandoning me on the horizon of their Prussian blues…

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How do I do?

How do I paint you in that fleeting vision

That flees from consciousness?

How can I free this spirit

gain perspective in these shadows

when the physical realm is so intransigent?

.

I have to stop dreaming…

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Nostalgia of collisions, of lovers bliss

celebrating scarlet passions on veridian shadowed grasses.

But you were so alive…

Running up hills dressed in your best sunflower yellows.

You captured my eye, romanced my heart within vibrant symbolism…

To leave me so lost without you…

.

How many letters can I write?

How deep is the ink well of fascination?

I fear the blackness bleeding

like the creeping shadows that shut out the stars

enclosing me in blurry abstract nights.

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Even when my eyes are open

sun-streaked, cold, in lapis lazuli ponderings

I am still dreaming…

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Reflected in the mirror

eyes pleading, hopeful, vivid

holding your textured visions of burnt luminescent orange hues.

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Alizarin crimson cheeks

blotchy against cadmium red string flames.

Can’t stop dreaming…

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As pink (mad)der pouted lips pose

waiting for the unconscious thought…

.

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©2012 Tikarma Vodicka

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16 thoughts on “In My Paint Box…

  1. What a great bit of dreaming and letter writing you have projected here, Tikarma. There is a bit of reflective association concerning the letter writing. Not my letter written to someone, but someone’s letter written to me. I write horrible letters, but she is a remarkable person who comes alive with pencil (not pen, just pencil) in her hand and a blank, ruled sheet of writing paper.

    There is an aside to y comments, just got carried away. I see this poem, which is both sad and bursting with life’s energy. Using the different colors to make your letter-writing point was phenomenal in my opinion.

    I began this with the best intentions, and I loved the poem and the usage of colors and dreams and lost love, or maybe just lost interest, but I quite honestly don’t feel too good so I will just leave my comments as they are. I think I need to lie down. Wonderful poem, Tikarma.

    1. Hi Jerry,

      Thanks for reading and your kind words especially when you’re not feeling well. I hope it something which passes quickly for you.

      I don’t write letters nearly as much as I used to these days. email isn’t quite the same.
      I’m glad you liked the poem. No lost love, just the eternal push and pull of the love affair with my own muse of creativity.

      Thanks again, and I hope you are feeling well soon.

      Tikarma. xx

  2. Hi Tikarma,

    This is such a wonderful poem on the inner daydreams of the artist. How the world changes in it perspective. That not all you see is how it is, but how it might be on the canvas. There is a darkness there too of all consuming passion, but one that will embrace the challenge. Colour, light and the expirience of the human condition screams to be put on canvas. It is all consuming. I know the places my mind goes into songwriting and composing, and it is all dominating. Life becomes a daydream of your art. But, that is the life of an artist. It is not about what is, but what could be. The possibilities are endless, and one must grasp that horses tail of inspiration as it gallops by you at speed, so you can ride it to it’s end.

    Well done Tikarma. This was such a joy to read!

    With all the love in my heart, always and forever,

    Jamie

    ♥♥♥

    1. Hi Jamie,

      Thank you for your very kind comments. I really glad you enjoyed the poem.

      Yes what one envisages often changes from dream to reality. The world of what could be does have to change for the physical realm of what will work! 🙂
      True there is always a darkness of something becoming not a love but an obsession. I suppose in a simialr manner with peope we can become over involved, possessive or unhealthily obessed in our desires. Even with ones artistic endevours one has to maintain balance of when to walk away and give it a rest and when to devote yourself to seeing it come to life. 🙂

      I’m very glad there were many levels on which you could relate with your songwriitng and composing. Indeed that is a brilliant metaphor for what happens when inspiration grabs you, grabbing the horses tail. 🙂

      Thanks again. It is good to be able to share and compare creative journeys with you. 🙂

      Yours always in love
      ♥♥♥♥
      Tikarma
      xoxoox

  3. Wow Tikarma! You need no defence for this poem, it’s gorgeous!

    And although I felt a little melancholy while I read it, (not really describing the poem but more where I am at the moment) I could also see and feel it bursting with vibrant colours!

    I love writing letters. There is a skill to it I feel and there are too many emails these days.:)

    Love and
    (((BIG WARM HUGS)))

    Christine xx

    1. Hi Christine,

      Thank you very much for your most kind response. I’m very glad you enjoyed this poem and all the colours. 🙂

      I’m sorry to hear that a melancholy has slipped in. I do hope you are able shake it and find a space or a moment where it evaporates with the spring sunshine, even if just for a little while. ((hugs))
      My paintng and wiritng stave it off for me, which may be why so much of my work ends up melancholy, but I find it helps keep me balanced. All the colours are my sunshine. 🙂

      I love wiritng letters too but I don’t nearly get the time there used to be. There are too many emails, I do agree. 🙂

      sending you much love and
      ((((BIG WARM HUGS)))
      Tikarma
      xoxxox
      p.s. I’ll be catching up with bogs over the next day or two. I’m slow off the starters block this week. *sheepish grin*

  4. This is definitely my favorite poem now!!

    I wonder how many times more you will change my mind… 🙂

    I did not think anyone could describe this part of creativity – but you have done it so well that you actually got me to “have to comment ”
    🙂
    wishing your painting week to go just as well!!
    with Love
    mum with Karley xOOOx

    1. Hi Mum,

      Thank you very much. I’m really glad that you enjoyed this poem so much it made it into the favourites. 🙂
      I’m glad I can keep adding to that favourites list. 🙂

      *cheeky grin* I knew you couldn’t stay away forever, *lol* and I think it’s great our respective artistic paths have so many points of relation.
      My week has started slow but with steady progress. Thank you 🙂

      I hope you have a very good week too!

      With lots of love
      PATS for Karley
      (((BIG HUGS)))
      Tikarma
      xoxoxo

  5. This is a wonderful as always post you write. I’ll be sending an email shortly your way. I Hope you are doing fantastic! *HUGS*

    1. Hi Diana,

      Thanks very much for your kind words. I’m glad you enjoyed the poem. 🙂

      Thank you for your email. I’m sorry I’ve fallen off the planet again. The Easter holidays and now doctors have and are taking up my free time, but I’ll be catching up over the next couple of days.
      Thanks. 🙂 My week has started slow but good. I can’t complain.
      I hope you are a having a great start to your week!

      (((BIG HUGS)))

  6. What a beautiful love poem.

    Our individual relationship with our own muse is something a bit special and I think this poem has captured perfectly the nature of that relationship. Like all love affairs it has its ups and downs, its frustrations, its falling out and its making up and of course its passion.

    I love how you describe your relationship with different colours and I guess a colour can be an indicator of mood!!

    Your last two lines are just perfect – they made me smile.

    I may well print off your picture of the paint box just as a little motivator for myself.

    I do hope your week is going well

    Arohanui
    (((BSH)))
    and K’sOTC 🙂
    David
    xoxox

    1. Hi David,

      Thank you very much for reading and your kind response.

      I’m glad you enjoyed the poem and coiuld see it for the love poem that indeed it is. 🙂
      I find the process of relationship with creativtiy fascinating all the more because the creativity does become like another person in your life.

      Colour certainly can be an indicator of mood, sometimes it describes your mood and sometimes using the colour can become your mood. 🙂
      I’m glad you like the little photo of my paint brushes. I hope it helps with the motviation and the inspiration. 🙂

      The last two lines *big* 🙂 they were I admit a last minute bit of playfulness. They are very apt to me though and I’m glad it gave you a smile. 🙂

      Thank you. My week is slow and clunky to start with doctors appointments but it is going well. I’ll have an email to you very soon. 🙂
      I hope the spring weather is just right for you and for inspiration to take hold. I hope the week is going well for you too. 🙂

      Arohanui
      (((BSH)))
      and K’sOTC 🙂
      Tikarma
      xoxooxox

  7. This is wonderful, Tikarma: I’m the world’s worst artist (seriously) and stand in awe of those who can draw and paint. I love the way you use colours – Tyrian blue, lapis lazuli, which are beautiful words in themselves- to describe emotions, and the contrast with your ‘fear of the blackness bleeding’. Superb. N.x

    1. Hi Nick,

      Thank you very much for taking the time out to read and for your lovely response.
      I’m really glad you enjoyed the use of colours in the poem.
      I’m far from mastering the art of painting and drawing is a constant struggle. That said love and passion for the medium you work with is certainly a must I think.
      You are a painter I’m afraid :-)..you paint with words so eloquently that the images of ages past and landscapes of beauty form effortlessly in the mind of your readers. That’s a skill and talent I greatly admire.

      Thanks again for stopping by.

      Tikarma. x

  8. This is simply beautiful Tikarma. I live, as you may know, inside a family of artists: Ethel, Kevin, one daughter (Sonja), and two grandchildren, William and Phoebe, who can look at a set of colors, pick something up, start to sketch, and pretty soon creativity spills out on the canvas as something recognizable or something not, but always alive, breathing with colors and the sounds of colors as their eyes get so intense their bodies seem charged with lightning. This poem is so filled with the creativity and lightning that it almost stuns me. You are really a wonderful poet and a wonderful artist…
    forever dreaming
    and discovering words as your dreams
    color themselves on the white canvas
    of the daily making of your self.

    1. Hi Thomas,

      Thank you very much for taking the time to read, share and for your most kind comments. I am very touched.

      I grew up around my mothers art work, all her tapestries and designs and tools of her trade and also around many other artists from pottery to glass blowing. So I have always been fanscinated by the act of creation. Colours have been very dominant in my life as colour is so vital to my mothers tapestries, how they blend together their texture. It still stuns me what she is able to create through textiles.
      So I do very much relate to your perspective watching your family in all their artistic endevours.
      I never thought I would find myself in the place I looked upon as a young child head bent in total focus upon a canvas. And thus colours are now so very important to me.
      I suppose in some fashion this kind of life, a creative life, is the only one I know and certainly when I’m painting it is the happiest place.
      I think being surrounding by the arts whatever form they take is a wonderful and enriching life to be a part of.

      Thank you again very much.
      My apologies too that I’ve fallen behind with your blogs. My fatigue due to my current ill health is making it hard to keep up for me at the moment.

      Tikarma. x

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